kerepek merepek

Assalamualaikum =)


Hi drama queen nak beraksi nih. last update pasal sedih nak habis sem 3. alhamdulillah managed to finish it finally. with almost flying color, but almost lah tak flying. paham tak?

last last upate jugak cerita pasal kerja lama. sekarang dah kerja baru. aku macam kangaroo lah jugak. sekejap lompat sana sini. apa nak buat, rezeki or haven't be in the right place as what i study and imagine to be. which is counselor.

okk so currently I am a PERMATA educator. pendidik PERMATA bahasa melayu dia. baru lagi. buat susu pon menggeletar lagi. HAHA. i'm not sure why, this time my adaptation was very bad. what makes it bad? SERIOUSLY NO ANSWER AT ALL.


but the bad was very bad i could say. selama hidup aku lah, aku tak pernah ada masalah nak berkomunikasi. umi masa hantar aku pergi matrik, malam tu dia call, dia cakap "umi tak risau, umi tau akak senang ada kawan". but this time?

SUCK. yang suck tu aku. aku macam tak reti lagi nak fully mingle around dengan pendidik kat sini. dia macam all in fake moment. I still cannot be me. can't be in their daily conversation. so stuck. so shy. seriously I hate me! who can help? tsk.


then, I still did not prepare as this going to be my permanent job. I still feel like I'm in a training and going to leave soon. I do feel like that. why?


since that was my thought, I have to finish up my study and do something with my life. sounds serious. haha. I have plan. May Allah ease. =)


currently stay at Putrajaya. and the place is.................. I just don't like it. tsk. pasal rumah semua nih, nanti lah cerita. so many things too think. hmph.


sem ni ada lagi dua subjek before thesis. Ya Allah yang nilagi cabaran hebat. May Allah ease all my journey. amin. aminnn.


ok lah. saja nak merepek. no point at all. bye!

another tears for third sesmster

seriously. this is not the easy step. tonight i was so gloomy. i hate the books, the works, the journal. i hate all! reason?

i have none. all I know......................


i want to find my spirit to finish this. cepat lah habis master, dah suffer dah aku rasa nii!!! huwahh.


adik adik yang nak sambung tu, betol lah kata kawan ahkak. nak sambung kena betol betol berminat, betol betol ada aim. jangan main sambung sebab nak ada master. nanti jadi macam ahkak.

ni betol betol nak muntah. sampai jadi tak tentu arah dah ni. huwahhhh.

Allah ease my way Allah. I bonded with scholarship. so I have to finish this. Allah help meeeee........ ;(


goodbyee! =(

update life yang Alhamdulillah

Assalamualaikum and Salam Jumaat =)


true, correct, absolutely we cant compare our life with others because there is no ending of satisfaction. the unique human affect the non-ending unique life. so, if we can't stop to compare, stop reading others story. (ni pesan kat diri sendiri).

so all and all, Alhamdulillah for whatever life that I have now.

while others preparing on their big day, I still busying set up the life. but He the Most Knowing and Merciful, He lends me Kak Mun, to keep telling me, so what if we haven't married yet. (sure lah Kak Mun tak cakap camni, she's... I could say great heart girl). yes surely, He knows best what I'm capable of. kadang kadang pikir betol jugak. dorang yang dah kawen, either memang dah fully settle down or memang cukup dengan apa yang dorang ada sekarang. aku... bukan tak cukup. but I love to enjoy this busiest life. macam defense mechanism je lah pulak ayat ni. but seriously, I enjoy working and scheduling everything day and night, without stop. tapi kalo penat, paham lahh menggila dia camana. sorry closest people. especially you, the victim.

long paragraph skip please.

currently, I could say I'm stuck in... RA works, not one researcher now two. one is data collection, another one is methodology process. I enter GSM at 9am, the next time I look at watch it's 1pm. break a while. then 2pm next time 6pm. go back. part kerja lah.

part study pulak. damn me. Im too lazy to go to class. but I want A. seems like not so much deserve. Allah, help me please... hello, those who not showing the effort, he or she will not success. surely quote and proved. so? MOVE lah. be more rajin please?

then, at night... surely tuition class. the student getting closer to the end of the year. as for UPSR, now i have to prepare more. as for the rest, I have to  make sure they improve a bit, at least. But i enjoyed this damn much. seriously. at least in at least one hour a day, I can still be a teacher. dah KPM tak nak kiteeww nak buat caneee. tsk. haha.


apart from all, now struggling to put all in control. believe it or not, I start to have my life schedule. LOL me. tapi not bad, feel like more organized. washing cloth, folding them, put in the locker, sweeping floor, etc etc. mak mak sangat tau. tapi best lah lepas penat balik keja semua, tengok bilik bersih je.. sejuk rasa hati. hehe.


ok dah lah. this is my third days to understand this creepy MG-PDC. why I cant find the way to analyze it. or it just simply observation list which give no result? HELP!


wish me luck. bye! =)

Raya 2014.

Fresh Monday

Assalamualaikum =)


i don't know why, but feel so refreshing today. sebab pakai sabun Jeny kot fresh mende tah tadi. haha. seriously i just love this weekend. i hit a lot. i so cool awesome time. Alhamdulillah.

start with Jumaat lepas kerja, pegi buka rumah bakal (inshaAllah). don't feel any kekok there. sampai terlupa kejap, I'm not yet part of the family. Lol. but truly, have to struggle a bit lah. since all his siblings are elder than me. topik perbincangan tu macam..... izit the right question to ask? mihmih.

okay then, his mom just give me the great idea. she invited (macam over je invited) okay she asked me to join solat tasbih, solat dhuha and solat taubat kat masjid rumah dia. kebetulan lagi, sabtu pagi tu tak boleh tidur dah lepas sahur. kebetulan lagi, we plan to go to VF Sabtu tu. so alang alang, aku join lah solat tuu. Syukur sangat, gave lot of benefits there. Alhamdulillah...

pegi VF, shopping tak mana. sempit. panas. crowded. em macam macam lah. oh paling penting no cash. ingat ATM ada banyak banyak. sekali satu je, which the queue is longgggggggg. serious sama panjang macam 'g' yang aku taip banyak banyak ni. so dengan cash yang ada la 100 je, boleh la beli satu benda. tsk. tapi betol lah. aku dah tua. aku dah tak selesa nak bersempit dengan orang ramai. i start to hate crowd. so, no more enjoying shopping at any crowded place. huh.

lepas balik VF tu, petang la, teros zass pegi putrajaya. nak sangat dengar Mufti Menk punya talk live. hehe. so... Alhamdulillah dapat pegi sana. tengok bazaar yang super awesome. and.... rembat baju baju murah untuk raya dekat festival depan masjid tu. dia bukak 12pm to 12am. tempat luas. sejuk depan masjid, eh? tapi memang best. dengan semua yang jual tu akak akak yang saja buat part time kat situ. so kau masuk, "kak baju ni berapa?" "90 dik". "70 boleh?" "haa ambik lahh." mau tak seronok aku. berplastik plastik aku rembat. rasa nak pegi lagi esok. Ja, did you read this? jom nak? haha.

malam tu teros tido rumah dila. esok pagi balik singgah Jusco AU2 sekali kasut dia gila gila sale. swiss polo 70% dah jadi satu 35 something pon ada. beli jelaa. susah nak ada sale lagi. jap susah nak ada sale and ada duit masa sale tuu. hehe. so Alhamdulillah.

basically barang barang raya aku dah complete dah. tudung jela. tu pon nak cari wide shawl je pon. itu nanti nanti pon takpee. hehe.


lagi yang best, dapat catch up latest story dengan Jeny, dengan kawan kawan comrade yang lain. best!


so here i come. Monday! esok cuti tu yang lagi excited gegilaa! hehe.


ok lah. almost 9. time to go to work. bye! =)

something killing me

Assalamualaikum =)


as my last entry i wrote about RA work. Alhamdulillah got thousand million trillion free time now. itslike super duper free. but... something is killing me. How?

like this.

I have to record every single activities at information counter in GSM. okayy. so every time when the student came in, first i have to look at time. second, snap the picture or video. third, jot down draft about the activities.

since i hate for play the time, like a lot. this bothering me. i really love the sudden time expression. likeeee 730am look again at watch its 4pm.

so be in this job, seriously killing. but..... maybe in adaptation mood lagi kot. takpee, adaptation. adaptation. huh.

itu je nakbising bising sikit.

oh ya this month, having difficulties in financial. dah lama tak rasa. haha.

i bought a new car. so... eh second hand car jela. but i love it so much. nak tengok? lol

haven't give him a name yet. haha. any idea? nak nama yang elok sikit. lol.

okay so start from now on kena jimat jimat sikit. ad paling penting kena la keja rerajin. enough playing. inshaAllahh. =)

okbai nak sambung baca journal for personality bored class. bye! =)

Bcs im glad

Salam Ramadhan...

May this Ramadhan bring something to us. Kalau tak banyak sikit pon jadi lah. Sikit yang macam..... jadikan masjid tu tempat sangat indah untuk singgah keee, enjoy baca quran translation keee. At least take something from this Ramadhan and make it our practise for the next next month after Ramadhan. May Allah bless us all.

Currently i start my new job. Macam kangaroo rasa. Kejap keja tu, kejap keja ni. Fengsan! But Alhamdulillah Allah, this ain't the small chance u give me. Lot of doors u let me explore. Feel bless and Alhamdulillah.

Dari aku habis belaja, May 2013, i plant a strong will yang sampai lah aku dapat posting i will never stop explore. Harini nak throwiback semua sampai laa ni. Kot la macik dah tua nanti, baca ni boleh jugak ingat. Hikhik.

Ok right a week after i finished my study, lepas final presentation and submission, i went for many interviews. Bukan keja bidang i lah, any job. Then i start to taste the feeling as telemarketer. Not last long since, have told the reason on my previous entry.

Ok then jobless. That time almost Ramadhan last year. I walked alone in KL, went for interview here and there. Went inside the big building like.... alamak dah lupa. Ada kat kelana jaya, ada kat kl central depan dia, macam macam. Alone with the files of resume and certs. Nasib takde adegan bawak beg balik kampung tu. Boleh teros buat drama. Hehe.

Okk then alhamdulillah. 2,3 days of Ramadhan i got the job at Smart Reader Kids, Sri Petaling. That was my most precious exploration in life. Knowing them, be a teacher to those kids, havig chance to mingle with non Muslim community, so great experience. I worked there around 8 months.

At my firat semester of master, i still working there. Enjoyed to the max that time. Where i dont have time to think about what Moja is doing since i was too busy. We havent have figbt quite long that time. Hypothesis: the more you contact each other, the more u have fight. Lol. Tapinyaaaa, penat tak yah cakap. Im facing critical backpain at that time. Penah benti tepi MRR2 nangis dah tak boleh drive sebab sakit gila. Haha.

Just imagine, 7am woke up from BTR to Sri Petaling. Working.... around 3pm, i have to drive to IIUM for class. Everyday. if lucky the jammed havent start yet, if not jammed from Sri Petaling to Gombak jammed hokayy. Tido kat Shell dalam keta kat kat gombak tu. Kalo sampai awal sikit. Kalo sampai lambat, mamai mamai masuk kelas. Hehe.

9 or 8pm camtu kelas habis. Masuk library jap buat preparation untuk kelas esok or any homeworks. Sampai 1030pm drive balik BTR. And mula hari lepas tu pon macam tuuu.

Tapi Alhamdulillah my result for that semester much more great than second semester. Hehehe.

I quit the job on March 2014. Start new life, as tuition teacher at Smart Math Sri Gombak and Damansara. Abt this one, amazing sangat tau rezeki Allah masa ni. I just start to feel tired and want to quit from the job, Smart Reader, not bcs of people bcs of distance. Suddenly, someone call that morning abd offer me the job and the pay is very good. Alhamdulillah. Im still doing this job at this time. Tapinya keja ni malam. I still have time for morning.

Bukan tak bersyukur tauu. Dia macam i want mu schedule full of things. Kelas master petang. Morning?

Then around April 2014 i be a teacher at SRI Ar-Rahmaniah. Teach Math, sns and English. Ok lah keja ni get more experience. But nkt last long since i rent the house outside, and i plan to buy a car. So have to get more money.

So.... i quit the job and be the Research Assistant.. i just started like 4 days. So far i still into it. Alhamdulillah.

I guess should stop here. Panjang sgt dah ni. Hekhek.

So people out there, go explore! Go go go!!!! Allah created us for go find the good in this world but dont forget the akhirat. Dont stay still. The 28.6.2014 ada sekali je dalam seumur hidup. Why let it be just like that?

Camana pon, im so thankful to Allah. The door He opens. The health body He gives, the patient He granted me, etc. As well as my family for always support and make easy on my little and big steps. Alhamdulillah.

Throwback panjang lebar da habis. Mohon manfaat. Byeee ! :)

truly happen

ko penah ke tengok orang buat keja kat library menangis?
harini aku betol betol macam out of control.
i was like..... I'm losing myself.
i don't know what i want.
i gloomy over nothing.
why?

that's why i'm crying.
i don't have reason.


feel like want to go somewhere, but don't know where and why.

just feel like to being kidnap and bring me anywhere I don't care.


bring me somewhere..... huwahhh. =(