something killing me

Assalamualaikum =)


as my last entry i wrote about RA work. Alhamdulillah got thousand million trillion free time now. itslike super duper free. but... something is killing me. How?

like this.

I have to record every single activities at information counter in GSM. okayy. so every time when the student came in, first i have to look at time. second, snap the picture or video. third, jot down draft about the activities.

since i hate for play the time, like a lot. this bothering me. i really love the sudden time expression. likeeee 730am look again at watch its 4pm.

so be in this job, seriously killing. but..... maybe in adaptation mood lagi kot. takpee, adaptation. adaptation. huh.

itu je nakbising bising sikit.

oh ya this month, having difficulties in financial. dah lama tak rasa. haha.

i bought a new car. so... eh second hand car jela. but i love it so much. nak tengok? lol

haven't give him a name yet. haha. any idea? nak nama yang elok sikit. lol.

okay so start from now on kena jimat jimat sikit. ad paling penting kena la keja rerajin. enough playing. inshaAllahh. =)

okbai nak sambung baca journal for personality bored class. bye! =)

Bcs im glad

Salam Ramadhan...

May this Ramadhan bring something to us. Kalau tak banyak sikit pon jadi lah. Sikit yang macam..... jadikan masjid tu tempat sangat indah untuk singgah keee, enjoy baca quran translation keee. At least take something from this Ramadhan and make it our practise for the next next month after Ramadhan. May Allah bless us all.

Currently i start my new job. Macam kangaroo rasa. Kejap keja tu, kejap keja ni. Fengsan! But Alhamdulillah Allah, this ain't the small chance u give me. Lot of doors u let me explore. Feel bless and Alhamdulillah.

Dari aku habis belaja, May 2013, i plant a strong will yang sampai lah aku dapat posting i will never stop explore. Harini nak throwiback semua sampai laa ni. Kot la macik dah tua nanti, baca ni boleh jugak ingat. Hikhik.

Ok right a week after i finished my study, lepas final presentation and submission, i went for many interviews. Bukan keja bidang i lah, any job. Then i start to taste the feeling as telemarketer. Not last long since, have told the reason on my previous entry.

Ok then jobless. That time almost Ramadhan last year. I walked alone in KL, went for interview here and there. Went inside the big building like.... alamak dah lupa. Ada kat kelana jaya, ada kat kl central depan dia, macam macam. Alone with the files of resume and certs. Nasib takde adegan bawak beg balik kampung tu. Boleh teros buat drama. Hehe.

Okk then alhamdulillah. 2,3 days of Ramadhan i got the job at Smart Reader Kids, Sri Petaling. That was my most precious exploration in life. Knowing them, be a teacher to those kids, havig chance to mingle with non Muslim community, so great experience. I worked there around 8 months.

At my firat semester of master, i still working there. Enjoyed to the max that time. Where i dont have time to think about what Moja is doing since i was too busy. We havent have figbt quite long that time. Hypothesis: the more you contact each other, the more u have fight. Lol. Tapinyaaaa, penat tak yah cakap. Im facing critical backpain at that time. Penah benti tepi MRR2 nangis dah tak boleh drive sebab sakit gila. Haha.

Just imagine, 7am woke up from BTR to Sri Petaling. Working.... around 3pm, i have to drive to IIUM for class. Everyday. if lucky the jammed havent start yet, if not jammed from Sri Petaling to Gombak jammed hokayy. Tido kat Shell dalam keta kat kat gombak tu. Kalo sampai awal sikit. Kalo sampai lambat, mamai mamai masuk kelas. Hehe.

9 or 8pm camtu kelas habis. Masuk library jap buat preparation untuk kelas esok or any homeworks. Sampai 1030pm drive balik BTR. And mula hari lepas tu pon macam tuuu.

Tapi Alhamdulillah my result for that semester much more great than second semester. Hehehe.

I quit the job on March 2014. Start new life, as tuition teacher at Smart Math Sri Gombak and Damansara. Abt this one, amazing sangat tau rezeki Allah masa ni. I just start to feel tired and want to quit from the job, Smart Reader, not bcs of people bcs of distance. Suddenly, someone call that morning abd offer me the job and the pay is very good. Alhamdulillah. Im still doing this job at this time. Tapinya keja ni malam. I still have time for morning.

Bukan tak bersyukur tauu. Dia macam i want mu schedule full of things. Kelas master petang. Morning?

Then around April 2014 i be a teacher at SRI Ar-Rahmaniah. Teach Math, sns and English. Ok lah keja ni get more experience. But nkt last long since i rent the house outside, and i plan to buy a car. So have to get more money.

So.... i quit the job and be the Research Assistant.. i just started like 4 days. So far i still into it. Alhamdulillah.

I guess should stop here. Panjang sgt dah ni. Hekhek.

So people out there, go explore! Go go go!!!! Allah created us for go find the good in this world but dont forget the akhirat. Dont stay still. The 28.6.2014 ada sekali je dalam seumur hidup. Why let it be just like that?

Camana pon, im so thankful to Allah. The door He opens. The health body He gives, the patient He granted me, etc. As well as my family for always support and make easy on my little and big steps. Alhamdulillah.

Throwback panjang lebar da habis. Mohon manfaat. Byeee ! :)

truly happen

ko penah ke tengok orang buat keja kat library menangis?
harini aku betol betol macam out of control.
i was like..... I'm losing myself.
i don't know what i want.
i gloomy over nothing.
why?

that's why i'm crying.
i don't have reason.


feel like want to go somewhere, but don't know where and why.

just feel like to being kidnap and bring me anywhere I don't care.


bring me somewhere..... huwahhh. =(

evening story

Assalamualaikum =)

ala salu camni, bila baca blog orang excited je rasa nak tulis cerita aku. tapi lepas tulis salam kat atas tu, stuck. malas. teros kadang kadang tu delete je. yang ni tak tau nak delete ke apa lagi.


i almost reach the end of my second semester. after this sem, inshaAllah left me with another 3 more subjects. sekejap kan rasa? lepas ni tinggal nak perang perang dengan coursework, then yeay.... what's next?

tapi.... sem ni sindrom 25 tahun dah datang. gila bapak pemalas nak pengsan. aku macam dah jadi orang yang takde wawasan. maleh. asal lulus. ngeng betol!

tapi aku nak gak result cam sem lepas. amin amin amin.


life this day is kind of tough. having such unpleasant health make me so much lazy to do many things. rabu haritu, aku boleh ponteng keja lagi. mashaAllah. aku macam kena pasrah je kalo agak agak ustaz kat tempat keja tu nak marah pon. sobs.


alaaa tah kenapa tah. this is not my living choice. i hate to be this type of me. tak productive langsung. hmph.


ok dah la. tetiba dah malas nak cerita lagi. haha. sokmo lah gini. kbai!

AKU DAH KENAPA???

Assalamualaikum =)

paham tak rasa apa malam ni?? aku macam bangang sangat sangat.

i have ton of works. alaa tapi senanya aku rimas gelap gelap. even now like cerah 40% its never enough. i love to live in 200% light. tapi dah fatin tido. kongaja sangat lah kalo aku nak pi bukak lampu.

dah tuu, aku dah terminum redbull. lepas tu lagi, aku dah target nak siap benda, tapi bangangnya aku asyik scroll facebook. dah kenapaaaa?

ok lahh! cuba try lagi tengok tengok kerja. just feel like want to shout but... all ears seems busy. kbai! =)

proud for be first child =)

Assalamualaikum =)


as usual lah, once one of my brother finish SPM I will be the real runner, search here and there, look at the possible U, scholarship, macam macam. memang aku jela yang buat.

but I'm not here for merungut. seriously feel more glad for this responsibility, as well as like could give me space for apply what I study.


but I always return back to my time. I have nobody. even internet pon takde, surf kat CC. aku ingat lagi masa tu dah la guna motor lama abi. scooter besar tu. berkarat tak payah cakap lah. every time aku sampai luar CC budak-budk sekolah mesti pandang. bila nak park, bukan boleh tongkat biasa. kena angkat stand. berat dia tuhan jela tau. masa tu aku dah la berat 40kg jek. tapi angkat jugak. dah nak sangat surf internet tengok apa yang sesuai dengan result aku.

lepas tu, mula mula aku depan pc, nak tengok internet kat mana pon tak tau. haha. lepas tu aku nampak ada tempat chat. apa tah nama dia. tapi bukan MIRC or YM lah. yang bodoh bodoh jek. yang masuk room pastu, ada banyak banyak list. nanti dorang hai. aku dengan takde email suma macam mana nak log in.

tetiba aku tekan satu huruf atas keyboard, tetiba ada email user lepas. lepas tu, siap keluar password. aku enter je la. yes yes boleh masuk. so maybe la user ni banyak kawan. once log in je teros ada few yang heyhai semua. then aku direct teros tanya kat satu user nih, nama dia danial. aku teros terang dengan dia sebab tah rasa dia macam baik. aku tanya, dia guide satu satu. sampai aku ada user sendiri, sampai aku reti lah log in upu semua tu. haha.


since that, aku dengan danial rapat gila. dia pon baru lepas habis SPM masa tu. kebosanan je kot kat rumah. almost fall in love gak lah. haha. selalu gak phone call cakap semua. suara dia sebijik macam Moja. gelak semua lah sama. sampai lah dia masuk Matrik, diadah start ada crush sana sini. aku i dahla kebosanan kat rumah, boleh laa rasa stress kan dengar cerita dia. sampai aku masuk uia. lepas aku couple lepas tu dah lost contact.

eh ni cerita apa ni? haha.


okay, then bila dapat offer uia tu, which all english aku english b3 jek, struggle jugak pahamkan by dictionary apa dia nak, form semua lah. alhamdulillah manage to enter without problem.

sama lah semua sekali semua aku buat sendiri.

those up here totally different dengan adik adik aku. adik second aku, aku apply kan KPM tu. masa ni rumah aku takde internet jugak. pegi lagi CC cari kan mana yang sesuai. cari kat paper mana mana kolej yang ok. since masa tu result dia tak ok sikit.

nombor tiga aku advisor je. since he's stay with my aunty. plus we quite far.

nombor 4 yang sekarang nih. aku pon dah grad counseling student, alhamdulillah banyak jugak boleh tolong. tapi dia boleh pulak, dah dapat pon.. "akak tak paham dia nak apa. tolong kejap." choi.

ok nak pegi masak. see ya! bye

and I appreciate my healthy time

Assalamualaikum =(


I woke up today, my back seriously ain't kidding. It's so much pain. I try to be relax, take a shower, breakfast and sit. right after I just open the PDF file for read, then start again.

how I'm going to finish my works? ton of works. every time I sit for working it start to get pain.

my smell now is full like nona roguy. dah tu, asal sakit apu minyak. back patches tak payah cakap lah.


appreciate our healthy body. because when it get sick or pain, you no longer feel safe and happy to finish the works.

ok alarm on. have to go to Damansara for works. nak drive tu... halamakk!


good byee! =)